After seven years of a wonderful marriage, Zack and August began having problems. August was befriended by Hashtag who openly shared confidential information entrusted to her by August with neighbors and of course on the weekly prayer line. Hashtag would say one thing to August but really harsh things about Zack and August to her friends and neighbors. Ultimately, slander nearly destroyed the couple.
The essence of slander is
to make people think
LESS of you.
Everyone at some point has experienced slander in their lives. Slander is making an untrue statement that damages a person’s reputation. As I meditated this morning, the spirit of the Lord moved me to write some things down and to speak to the destructive nature of slander. To understand slander, we have to understand the nature of slander. The essence of slander is to make people think less of you. The goal of slander is to defame your character. Slander is a perspective not a truth. The good news is that you have the power to breakthrough slander. We are warned, brothers and sisters, do not slander one another (James 4:11).
Good behavior discredits slander.
Your response to slander will determine your value. Only you can devalue yourself with your response. You cannot control the slanderer but you can control your tongue. David said, “They encircle me with words of hate, and attack me without cause (Psalm 109:3)”. Like David, be polite. Be level headed. Be above board. In the end, good behavior decredits slander.
Ignore or laugh off the defamatory remarks. This puts water on the fire of slander and eventually the fire will go out (Proverbs 26:20). People will lose interest in the slanderer’s story. Pray and wait for an appointed time to confront the slanderer.
It's never about you.
Sometimes confrontation is necessary for external and internal resolutions. The external resolution involves confrontation. When you believe it’s time to confront the person, focus on the person’s actions not the person’s character. Keep in mind that when someone slanders your name, it’s never about you but an untold story that is in their heart. You’re totally in control of the internal resolution. No one can control your emotions but you. You have the power and authority to control your emotions.
Slander is a perspective
not a truth.
Finally, guard your borders. Understand, there are some people in life that will never accept you for who you are. In your presence, they are your friend. Outside of your presence, they are your enemy. David warned King Saul about slanderers. He said, "Why do you listen to the words of men, saying, Behold, David seeks to harm you"? David understood that slander is a perspective not a truth. Notice, David never harmed King Saul, but was always polite, level headed, and above board. When things really got bad, David distanced himself from King Saul. Sometimes, you have to limit your exposure to toxic relationships.
PRAY: Arise, O LORD! Rescue me, my God! Slap all my enemies in the face! Shatter the teeth of the wicked! Lock the jawbones of my enemy today. Break the chain of slander that has tried to destroy me, my character, and my reputation. My God on whom I can rely. God will go before me and will let me gloat over those who slander me, in the name of Jesus. Amen!
~Dr. Regina M. Daigre, Inspirational Speaker and Leadership Trainer